Breaking the Barbie Box: A Fight for Realness in a World Obsessed with Perfection
Drawing Parallels Between Barbie’s Crisis and the Lived Experiences of Women in Golf, the Boardroom, and Beyond
In Greta Gerwig’s larger than life flick, “Barbie,” the world’s favorite plastic diva gets a reality check (and no, it’s not made out of silicone). With Margot Robbie slipping into Barbie’s impossibly tiny shoes, our beloved doll crash-lands from her bubble-gum kingdom straight into the messy world of real women. In waltzes America Ferrera as Gloria, Mattel’s sassy sage, serving as both guide and confidante, Gloria anchors Barbie’s journey of discovery. It’s during this transformative experience that Gloria delivers a poignant monologue, laying bare the myriad challenges women confront every day. Gloria articulates:
“It’s impossible to be a woman. We’re expected to be extraordinary, yet somehow, we always seem to get it wrong. We’re told to aim for thinness, yet can’t openly admit that desire. The world wants us to pursue wealth, but we’re judged if we do. We’re pushed to lead without overshadowing others. Celebrated if we’re mothers, but criticized if that becomes our sole identity. We’re held accountable for men’s behavior and vilified if we speak out. Society demands our beauty but condemns us if it’s perceived as too much. We’re urged to stand out, yet be a part of the sisterhood. It’s a world rife with contradictions, where everything seems to be our fault. This exhausting dance, seeking approval, feels endless. If even a doll, a mere symbol, faces these challenges, where does that leave us?”
As the credits roll, Ferrera’s biting words still echo, painting a raw tableau of the high-wire act women perform daily — from cutthroat corporate jungles to the sweat-soaked arenas of sports.
The film’s mantra, “Because Barbie can rock anything, so can women,” isn’t just a sassy catchphrase. It’s a stark reminder, juxtaposing an empowering ideal against the daily grind and glaring disparities women combat. Through Barbie’s technicolor adventures, Gerwig rips off the band-aid, exposing societal double standards thrown at women, especially when they’re thrust under glaring spotlights. It’s a tug-of-war between societal pressure to look ‘just right’ and the yearning for authentic self-expression, all set against a backdrop of deeply rooted patriarchy.
Enter the media, amplifying beauty standards often sidelining women’s raw talent. And, let’s be real, we’re complicit too, slapping on filter after filter, trying to fit into a pixel-perfect mold. This distorted representation doesn’t just dent our self-worth; it can shatter it. Likewise, the sports realm isn’t exempt. Sure, female athletes get props for their prowess, but there’s that pesky footnote: maintain the ‘right’ image — and oh, don’t be too emotional or outspoken while you do it.
In leadership roles, women face amplified challenges. They’re expected to lead decisively but gracefully, constantly measured against a standard of perfection that leaves no room for vulnerability.
“Barbie” holds a mirror to these challenges, emphasizing the need for society to both recognize women’s achievements and address the systemic issues they confront daily.
Megan Robb, a 23-year-old golfer from Aberdeen, Scotland, and NXXT Women’s Pro Tour golfer, has a story that deeply resonates with Greta Gerwig’s cinematic portrayal of “Barbie.” Like the iconic doll, Megan grapples with the societal expectations and standards of perfection, both on and off the golf course.
“On the golf course, everything is fine. I am only focused on my game,” she shares candidly. “But off the golf course, things are rather different. I do feel pressure to perform. If I play bad, I feel judged.” Megan’s perspective resonates deeply with countless other women navigating their professional arenas. The underlying pressure to always be perfect, to never slip up, becomes a tightrope walk. While Megan admits this could be her perception of how society views her, there’s an undeniable underlying current of judgment. The world of professional golf, she opines, is even more challenging for women. “Golf is hard as it is, but then you add the lack of finance involved and the possibility of motherhood into the mix. This is something males don’t have to fret about.”
When asked about the relentless societal pressure for eternal youth, something Barbie never escapes, Megan dives into the profound impacts of social media on young women’s self-worth and body image. “The primary instigator has been social media. We are surrounded by information on how we should look, behave, train, and practice.” In her formative years, Megan battled an eating disorder, a haunting testament to the weight of these expectations. “I am extremely thankful that I recovered when I did, but there are so many other young females who suffer the same and/or similar “disorders”, all resulting from the demands we feel as women.”
Her insights shine a light on the immense pressure female athletes, particularly golfers, are under. We only see the flawless shots and performances on mainstream media, creating unrealistic standards. “Unless you physically attend a LPGA event, the only shots we see on TV/social media are from the leaders who are playing the best golf on that day.” The real story, the struggle, the journey, often remains unseen, creating a dichotomy between public perception and personal reality.
Addressing America Ferrera’s potent speech in “Barbie,” Megan reflects on its relevance in professional golf. While she hasn’t personally felt the weight of having to be thin yet not “too thin,” or being a boss without coming off as “mean,” she does recall her time as the captain of her golf team. “I learned rather quickly that most of my teammates needed someone to listen to them… Having your own say and someone there to listen is powerful.”
In a sport that often prioritizes stoicism, Megan’s candid confession about the struggle to show emotion, particularly as a Scottish woman, underscores the nuanced challenges women face. “If I complain about my game, or anything in my life, then people are quick to assume I’m emotional as I am female.”
Megan’s journey is a stark reminder that while the fairways of a golf course may be manicured, the journey for women in sports, much like Barbie’s in the film, remains riddled with hurdles and expectations. However, it’s the voices and stories of individuals like Megan that illuminate the path forward, highlighting the need for empathy, understanding, and a shift in societal perception.
I recently had the opportunity to interview Wendy Dean, CEO at Strategi Solutions Group Limited about the Barbie movie and her experience with societal expectations. Her journey sheds light on the nuanced challenges faced by women in leadership, a sentiment mirrored in the portrayal of idealized femininity in the recent Barbie movie and America Ferrera’s impactful speech on societal pressures.
In the Barbie narrative, the eponymous character grapples with the unrealistic standards of perfection and idealization thrust upon her. Wendy resonates with this sentiment. She recalls instances when she didn’t fit the prototypical image of a woman for the boardroom. Much like Barbie’s struggle to reconcile her inherent “Barbie-ness” with her existential crises, Wendy too felt the weight of external expectations, often putting her under the microscope of perfectionism and self-doubt.
Wendy’s experience in the corporate world parallels Barbie’s struggle with ageless beauty. As Wendy progressed in her career, her accomplishments began to overshadow the demands she felt were on her appearance. Yet, she notes a troubling trend among younger women, emphasizing glamor over capability — an unsettling reflection of the beauty standards epitomized by characters like Barbie.
The expectations Wendy navigated were multifaceted. On one hand, she was faced with the “glass cliff” in the UK, a phenomenon where women leaders are set up for failure. On the other hand, she encountered what can be described as leadership “tokenism.” Much like the Barbie character’s quest for purpose beyond mere appearance, Wendy found herself in roles that felt more symbolic than substantial. However, echoing the resilience showcased in the Barbie narrative, Wendy transformed these situations into opportunities, asserting, “Whilst I’m there on the board, I may as well make a difference.”
America Ferrera’s speech in the Barbie movie eloquently voices the dichotomy women face — the need to be extraordinary, yet the constant feeling of doing it wrong. Wendy’s journey underscores this dichotomy. She speaks of the delicate balance women leaders must maintain, fostering collaboration without compromising authority — a challenge she believes is lesser for men who are often handed authority without question.
I too have been in the position of being a ‘token’ hire so the male executives could say they had a ‘diverse’ team. My voice was completely ignored and I had to pivot and fight to make a difference sometimes with success and sometimes with no success.
The beauty of Gerwig’s film is its reflection on the paradox: women are eternally perceived as “too much yet never enough.” But, in this shared narrative, there’s strength, unity, and the beacon of change. It’s not just about the struggles; it’s about redefining norms and breaking free from the shackles of relentless perfection.
While Gerwig’s “Barbie” touches upon the painful truths, it also offers hope — through collective experiences and stories, women can redefine standards, championing authenticity over curated perfection.
Wendy Dean’s and Megan Robb’s journeys are inspiring tales of resilience, adaptability, and the indomitable spirit to transform challenges into stepping stones.
Ready to kick the ‘perfect’ stereotype to the curb? Let’s face it: we’re not Barbie dolls, and it’s high time our self-worth stopped coming with an instruction manual. So, how do we school the next gen to rock authenticity over the latest Instagram filter? How do we champion genuine vibes in a world where ‘curated’ has become the new black?
Audrey Nesbitt
Estrogen and Hand Grenades Podcast
